Someone I Know Is Grieving

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Author: Edward Welch


Responding with Humility and Compassion

When someone is grieving, it can be hard to know what to say or do. We want to be helpful, not hurtful, but it’s easy to go wrong. The good news is that we can learn to approach those who are grieving with the same compassion that Jesus shows us when we are grieving. It starts with humility and listening well and expands into practical support as the Spirit leads us. 

In Someone I Know Is Grieving, Edward T. Welch leans on his many years of counseling grieving people to help readers learn from their compassionate Savior how to respond to people’s sadness and hard times without advice or trying to “fix it,” but to instead hear their story, learn from others’ experiences, and depend on the Spirit for wisdom for what to say and do.  


About the author: 

Edward T. Welch, MDiv, PhD, is a faculty member at the Christian Counseling & Educational Foundation (CCEF). Ed has been counseling for over forty years and has written extensively on the topics of depression, fear, and addictions. His biblical counseling books include Shame InterruptedWhen People Are Big and God Is SmallAddictions: A Banquet in the GraveDepression: Looking Up from the Stubborn DarknessRunning Scared: Fear, Worry, and the God of RestA Small Book about a Big ProblemA Small Book for the Anxious HeartA Small Book about Why We HideI Have a Psychiatric Diagnosis, and Someone I Know Is Grieving.  


“This book is a treasure. It does far more than show you how to respond with humility and compassion. Ed reveals how to become the kind of person that suffering people long for—and need. I'm going to do everything I can to make sure that all of our GriefShare leaders know about this powerful book.”  ~ Sam Hodges IV, President, GriefShare 

“Just like all of Ed’s teaching and resources, this book is beautifully Christ-centered, gospel-driven, and thoroughly practical. It marvelously and helpfully answers the essential question of how to help our friends and family in their suffering. All believers need to grow in how to comfort one another in Christ!”  ~ John C. Kwasny, Executive Ministry Director, Pear Orchard Presbyterian Church, Ridgeland, MS; director, One Story Ministries; author of several books, including Suffering in 3-D: Connecting the Church to Disease, Disability, and Disorder and Pursuing a Heart of Wisdom: Counseling Teenagers Biblically

“As I began reading through this great little book, I cringed at memories of unhelpful or untimely words I’ve heard others speak. But as I continued to read, my disappointment in others morphed into a conviction regarding my own shortcomings. Ed Welch humbly and gently ushered me into the lives of the grieving and showed me both the ways I’ve lacked compassion and the way forward in love. I am wiser and more seasoned for having read it, and I am eager to get it into the hands of our entire church family.”  ~ Scott Mehl, Pastor, Cornerstone Church of West Los Angeles

“It’s all too easy to misunderstand or mishandle people in mourning. In this insightful resource, Ed Welch helps us to consider how to become humble conduits of God’s comfort instead of hasty counselors who speak hurtful words. If you want to grow in your ability to speak with—not at—someone who is suffering grief, this book is for you.”  ~ Christine Chappell, Author of Midnight Mercies: Walking with God through Depression in Motherhood; host, Hope + Help Podcast, Institute for Biblical Counseling & Discipleship; certified biblical counselor

“As someone who is grieving the death of my wife, I was deeply moved by Ed Welch’s wisdom, compassion, and humility as he explores impactful ways to love those who are in my position. If you are looking for sensitive and practical ways to walk with anyone who is mourning the death of someone they love, this is the book to read.”  ~ Ron Lutz, Pastor Emeritus, New Life Presbyterian Church, Dresher, PA

“This Christ-centered book is a treasure chest of biblical wisdom and practical guidance for becoming a conduit of compassion. Reading it made me want to be more like Jesus. I look forward to seeing how the Holy Spirit uses it to help individuals and churches grow in humility and grace.”  ~ Paul Tautges, Pastor; counselor; author of several books, including A Small Book for the Hurting Heart: Meditations on Loss, Grief, and Healing

“Having been a pastor for many decades, I have personally witnessed the lack of sensitivity in the words of folks who think that they are comforting a bereaved person but are actually having the opposite impact. Welch’s practical book is exactly what we need as we search for the right words (and actions) to truly comfort others in their time of need. Very helpful to me were his suggestions of words to avoid!”  ~ Timothy Witmer, Author of The Shepherd Leader; emeritus professor of Practical Theology, Westminster Theological Seminary